Friday, February 15, 2008

Fifty More Things About Sean (Only Twenty of Which Are Absolutely True)

No, that sense of déja vu that you're feeling is not an error in the Matrix. It does not indicate that something has changed.

This is an obvious sequel to the original list of Fifty Things About Sean (Only Twenty of Which Are True). It's not a meme (although you can try it for yourself), and it's not here for any particular purpose. I just happen to be bored at the moment.

It's easy, really: I have a list of fifty self-referential claims below, only twenty of which are indubitably, undeniably true. It's up to you to figure out which is which, and I'm not about to confirm anything as a result of this post. That's left for you to freely speculate on, and perhaps you'll lose some precious sleep in the process. :)


FIFTY MORE THINGS ABOUT SEAN
(only twenty of which are absolutely true)

1. Once acted as a potted plant in a class presentation.
2. Once addressed a crowd of 200 for a seminar.
3. Once ate two pounds of cheese in one sitting.
4. Once attached refrigerator magnets to somebody else's CPU casing.
5. Once believed that the world would end on December 31, 1999.
6. Once blew up a microwave oven by placing a packet of soap inside.
7. Once brought the proverbial knife to a gunfight.
8. Once built an origami figure that could support five pounds of weight.
9. Once burned a hole into a laboratory table with sulfuric acid.
10. Once collected comic books.
11. Once constructed a working battery-operated motor.
12. Once cut himself with a pair of ice skates.
13. Once danced a can-can with six or seven other guys.
14. Once did lead vocals for a startup musical group.
15. Once dressed up as Godzilla for a childrens' party.
16. Once drew a political cartoon that was eventually published.
17. Once fell asleep in a Ferrari. (No, it wasn't mine.)
18. Once filled an entire attaché case with salted popcorn.
19. Once fixed a computer by hitting it (with a good hard smack).
20. Once got a piece of candy stuck up his nose.
21. Once had an eye operation to correct blurred vision.
22. Once "improved" a jigsaw puzzle by cutting up the pieces.
23. Once jumped off the third floor of a building.
24. Once killed a goldfish by pouring talcum powder into the fishbowl.
25. Once made a shot from the half-court line in basketball.
26. Once maintained a collection of G.I. Joe action figures.
27. Once offered witness testimony for a convicted criminal.
28. Once owned a Trapper Keeper.
29. Once performed a voice-over for a commercial.
30. Once ran with scissors.
31. Once recited background speech for a music video.
32. Once said, "I'm just a lazy peon in the Warcraft of life."
33. Once scraped an entire layer of teflon off the frying pan.
34. Once scripted a twenty-four-page comic book.
35. Once shaved his armpit hairs.
36. Once shot an imaginary arrow from an imaginary bow.
37. Once sold life insurance.
38. Once spoke with a stutter.
39. Once stole a license plate for a scavenger hunt.
40. Once stripped on stage.
41. Once submitted an English essay for Filipino class (and got an "A").
42. Once superglued his hand to his face.
43. Once swallowed a paperclip.
44. Once took six hyperactive dogs for a walk, all at the same time.
45. Once traded an entire collection of stickers for a single playing card.
46. Once tried out for a TV game show.
47. Once used a priceless diamond antique as a paperweight.
48. Once won a years' supply of Ovaltine.
49. Once worked for three hours on a single math problem.
50. Once wrote erotica.

...

2 comments:

Dominique said...

I believe #3. I think I can still see its effects. Nyuk nyuk!

Gem :3 said...

Seems to me that it's more fun to think that you actually did all these rather than trying to figure out the truth.
You're spreading rumors about yourself, my friend. Harhar.