Twenty Questions (The Interview Game)

There's a little Interview Game going around, and because "five questions" doesn't sound as good as the more common "twenty questions" expression, I've mixed up four different peoples' questions here. You're welcome to visit their respective blogs by clicking on their respective queries.

Oh, wait... you don't know how The Interview Game goes? There's an explanation at the end...


1. What is the greatest motivation for you to write?
In this world, there exist some pieces of art that bring their viewers or listeners so closely to emotional attachment that they cannot help but accede to the creator's demands. Some movies are so funny that they make you laugh out loud. Some symphonies are so sorrowful that they make you weep in sadness. Some writings are so strong that they make you scream in rage or fear.

I want to bring the reader to that threshold. I want to make them laugh, or cry, or rage, or fear, all based on the power of a mere set of words. I want to believe that the power of the imagination is so strong that it can take people inside themselves and see not only what I wish them to see, but to feel also what they believe they must feel. I want to prove that words are not just a means of expression, but a complex reality that we may all transcend.

2. If you would be in a reality TV show, what would it be?
Ugh. I like the concept of reality TV, but I hate the shows themselves. Any person in a reality TV show nowadays would forever be pandering to the whims of some deranged TV executive, which would be enough motivation for me to go out and strangle them all. That said, I'd like to be in any of the reality TV shows out there - just as long as I get to be the Host. :)

3. You receive a phone call in the wee hours of the morning from someone who claims to be your son – calling from the future. Do you entertain the call (it's long distance, overseas and charged to you)?
If my son would be anything like me, then he wouldn't be calling home unless it were really important. That said, no son-o'-mine would interrupt my beauty sleep if he knew what was good for him. I give him five minutes to tell me what he wants before I put down the receiver.

4. You're sitting in a park minding your own business. A golden retriever comes around, jumps on the bench and starts talking to you. He tells you he's God, and says that the latest pope is a bad idea. What do you do?
I'd ask him why he thinks Benedict XVI is a bad idea, and keep the conversation going. Maybe he's God, and maybe he's not, but for the moment all that I'd be interested in would be what he's like when we're actually talking to each other.

Alternatively, I could also just quip "Dude, you're naked," but then if he were really God, he'd probably just hit me with a lightning bolt or something. :)

5. The world ends in exactly one year. Aliens come and offer to save a very small amount of human knowledge. What 5 professions (i.e. hairdresser, policeman, violinist, etc.) would we offer to them to remember humanity by?
A combat medic, a militant imam, a comic book writer, an adult film 'actress' and a corporate spy. Each of those five professions illustrates the oxymoron that is mankind perfectly: A melding of destruction and preservation, peace and war, art and prose, attraction and disgust, ethics and disloyalty. Hopefully, they'd send the message that we were a confused bunch.

6. If this universe were to end tomorrow, and you were given the chance to enter a fictional universe from movies, TV, or literature, which one would you choose?
All fictional universes exist to tell stories, and as such they all have their non-fantastic trappings and ordinate dangers. I'd rather not end up mapping out unfamiliar risks in highly unfamiliar territory, so that eliminates a lot of universes right off the bat. (Getting myself paralyzed by Hogwarts' basilisk, having my soul eaten by an idle Kyoso no Oni, or losing my mind to the Arasaka Corporation doesn't have any appeal to it at all.)

That said, the "Next Generation" universe of Star Trek seems like a close enough fit to ours that I wouldn't mind being transplanted into it. It would be almost exactly like this world, only with more aliens and more technology. Just get me away from one of those starships, don't make me wear one of those red uniforms, and I'll be fine.

7. What three things would you bring with you to this alternate universe?
A piece of original comic art (whether the artist is known or otherwise), because it would continually emphasize the beauty of imagination to me. A pencil, because I'd still feel the need to doodle everywhere I go. A toothbrush, because when anybody asks me why I brought a toothbrush, I'd like to be able to say, "Because everybody always brings a toothbrush whever they go".

8. Special welcome dinner on this alternate universe, and you have a free hand to invite up to four guests, real or fictional. Who would they be?
Let's see... Zephram Cochrane, who would be a familiar figure in that universe; he'd bring some entertainment to the table without being too out-of-place. Jennifer Love Hewitt, because she'd start conversations (especially among the males in the room). Jimmy Kimmel, because he's a remarkably funny person without necessarily realizing it, and because he'd immediately want to talk to Jennifer Love Hewitt. Senator Mar Roxas, because he'd bring a bit of sanity to the table without being offended by the weird crowd.

Actually, any combination of four disparate personalities would work for me. I just name these four right now because they're all floating around my mind for some reason.

9. What line of work would you be doing in this alternate universe?
I'd probably be an information services administrator, i.e. a librarian. Not much work there, since the machines probably handle all the classification and procurement, and you get to read as much as you darn well want. Now if only those stupid Borgs wouldn't keep trying to hack into the systems...

10. You're working on a big, important project closely with a team. After several months, you're finishing the project, giving handshakes and approval, and when all the stress is done, out of glee and with no warning whatsoever, your cute female teammate suddenly grabs you by the neck and gives you a full kiss with everyone in sight. What do you do and what would you be thinking?
I'd grab her by the small of her back and sweep her off her feet, continuing the kiss in a position low to the floor. I don't get into these situations often, so I might as well enjoy them while they last. :)

What I'd be thinking? "Damn, I'd better work on projects like these more often."

11. Given the situation that you are in Baguio, you have a stalker and you are with a girl you really like, what would you do in order to deal with the stalker discreetly and still make sure that your girl (let's assume that she is your date ;) and also assume that the stalker has got it really bad for you - it's a scary kind of stalking now) won't get worried.
Easy. I simply wouldn't tell the girl that I had a stalker. Unless I had reason to fear that my stalker would be threatening her directly, telling her about the situation would simply worry her regardless of anything. As for the stalker, I wouldn't let him/her know where we were to begin with, and I simply wouldn't answer any calls as to my whereabouts. (Which would make the date much easier for me, too.)

12. What is the one film you really liked but no one else seems to appreciate (damn the bastards!)?
Tim Burton's The Nightmare Before Christmas. This was probably the deviant's deviant in terms of movies; I mean, it's an animated muscial done in claymation, intended for the adult crowd! Ironically, because of its extremely far-out elements, it never gets the attention it really deserves - people tend to dismiss it off-hand as merely a "weird creation" without seeing the beauty behind the mask.

13. As a student, what was the best prank that you executed?
I was a quiet, serious student, which means that I wasn't a prankster-type person. In fact, I still don't think I'm a prankster-type person. I probably can't plan a good joke to save my life. I think that I've been moderately successful at whatever I've been able to execute so far because I can spin whole yarns out of pure cloth, if you get what I mean.

14. Given the choice, would you rather have pure ampalaya or durian juice for the rest of your life?
Durian. Personally, I don't mind the smell of durian (jackfruit). It's the ampalaya that I just can't stand. I could almost swear that placing a huge chunk of the healthy nutrients in a horrible-tasting package is Nature's way of laughing at us.

15. Has anyone ever asked you to be a DJ?
A couple of baristas at Starbucks once asked me if I was a DJ. I told them that I wasn't one, but I'll probably fire off an on-air hello to them if I ever get the chance. :)

16. In the animal kingdom, the males are more attractive than the females. You wake up as an animal. What are you and what makes you irresistible?
Technically, it's all a question of the pheromones. On the average, male creatures secrete more pheromones because of a need to attract potential mates. That said, I'd wake up as an elephant. It's just too easy to be fascinated with elephants for their ponderousness, their silence, their mysterious rituals, and their incredible memory. Plus, they get these cool tusks.

17. What's the immediate, grossest way you'd like to experience your death?
Easy. If I were to die in an immediate, gory manner, I'd like to be decapitated. I would imagine that I'd feel absolutely no pain at any point during the procedure, I'd run through a very quick death, and I'd still have enough time to realize "Gee, I've just been decapitated. Cool." in my last moments.

18. You end up by a sea of red blood in a beach somewhere, and everyone in the whole world is dead. You see a coconut tree in the distance. Is it a mirage?
*Squints*... It's got Santa Claus, Benito Mussolini, and the members of Aerosmith all waving at me from between its branches. It's a mirage, all right.

19. The names of most medicines available at the drugstore are decidedly unsexy. Give me marketable and recallable names for a) asthma , b) male impotence, and c) constipation.
That's because most pharmacists aren't marketers - they have this irritating habit of naming medicines after the chemicals or generic brands used to create them. In order for medicines to be marketable, they would have to have names appropriate for their uses yet still sound like pharmaceutical products so that they can't be mistaken for consumer goods:

Asthma
"Asthmalax" sounds okay, for the moment. This would establish a clear link to the medical condition, for one. Seeing that some asthma medicines have to be taken every day, the name should really be able to roll off the tongue easily, much like "aspirin". ("Asthma" is difficult to pronounce, though.)

Male Impotence
I'm sold on the name "Viagra" already; as I understand, it's based on Romanic word origins that refer to "life". It's short and easy to pronounce as well; I don't think there are any other suggestions that can really top "Viagra".

Constipation
You literally need something that spells "relief" here, seeing that you can't really describe the other aspects of this condition. "Relievo" is too corny, though, and besides, the word already exists in a totally different context. "Reletamine" is closer, as the name should really sound smoother and more calm. "Relietamine", perhaps? You really want a calming tone here...

20. What is one thing that you want to people to remember about you?
Heck, I'd be happy if people just remember me, period. :)


So... how does The Interview Game work?

1. If you want to participate, leave a comment below saying “interview me.”
2. I will respond by asking you five questions - each person’s will be different.
3. You will update your journal/blog with the answers to the questions.
4. You will include this explanation and an offer to interview others in the same post.
5. When others comment asking to be interviewed, you will ask them five questions.

If you post your answers in your blog, send me a message so that I can look you up. If you don't have a blog, then you're welcome to post your answers here.