Tuesday, March 13, 2007

I Want My Mountain Dew!

Anyone noticed that quite a few of the convenience stores seem to be out of 600ml Mountain Dew bottles these days? Weird.

And it's not just the 7-11s and the Mini-Stops and the gas station outlets and whatever franchises there are in the area, mind you. I haven't seen a single bottle of Mountain Dew for a couple of weeks now, despite having visited two supermarkets over the last fortnight. I think I'm going through a slow, subtle withdrawal period as a result.

Yes, I know that the stuff is unhealthy. The fizzy yellow stuff is reputed to have more caffeine than a similar serving of coffee. In addition, enough doses will pump you with a total amount of sugar so high that it can cause your pancreas to malfunction. That, and apparently citrus-flavored drinks are the prime culprit when it comes to the weakening of tooth enamel. Based on what the nutritionists tell us, consuming massive amounts of Mountain Dew will one cause you to freeze up, keel over, and die twitching.

But darn it, I think it tastes good. And darn it, I can hardly find it anywhere anymore. What's the PepsiCola company up to, anyway?

If someone were to come up to me right now with a conspiracy theory involving inflated market demand, price-fixing, and aliens dressed up as drag queens, I would probably believe him. Anything to give me some closure here.

I find it bitterly ironic that Mountain Dew has few proper replacements on the shelves. I'll admit that Zest-O's dalandan soda has been pretty good so far, but it doesn't seem to have the same tang. Otherwise the only other choice I've got is the lemon-flavored stuff under the Virgin brand, and I'd rather drink drain fluid if it ever came to that.

I assure you, though: I'm not addicted to the stuff. Honest.

...

...

Aw, geez. What the heck happened to the Mountain Dew around here? I'd probably kill for some of the stuff right now.

6 comments:

Dom Cimafranca said...

Maybe you can't find them because they come in 500ml bottles, not in 600ml. But I understand, Sean: when your hands are quaking from the caffeine overload, it's easy to press one key instead of another.

=)

Sean said...

Dominique: I noted "600ml" because I couldn't remember the size of the serving that came with each container; I just know that I buy the stuff in bottles, and that I drink it.

And for that matter... shouldn't we be pointing out that I'm going through a caffeine withdrawal right now, as opposed to an overload? I am complaining about a lack of the stuff. :)

Unknown said...

{looks at the two 1.5 litre bottles of mountain dew in her fridge}

There's a shortage? I wouldn't know.

{takes a swig of the yellow fizzy goodness}

Hey, have you tried this with red bull? Tis Awesome! :D

Sean said...

Charo: I was going to complain about how you were just baiting me on the Mountain Dew thing, but the idea of mixing Red Bull with the stuff just strikes me as vaguely disgusting. :)

Kat said...

Ah, so that's why I feel this buzz every time I drink Mountain Dew.

Err, are you talking about the bottled ones? I don't know about you, but I don't see a shortage of Mountain Dew around. The Bonita Burger joint I pass by daily has a supply, and the small store in our neighborhood has those 1.5 liter ones. Want me to ship them to you? :D

Sean said...

Kat: Actually, the nearby supplies seem to have been replenished recently. After I guzzled to my heart's content, I stocked up a few bottles. :)